The Tomahawk Walk

So if you’ve been following my blog or just reading back into my posts, you’ll notice I don’t take kindly to crew who smoke.Tomahawk Walk

Why should they get extra 15 minute breaks all throughout the day because they’ve made the decision to reek of burning tar? Or go full on nicotine-fit Rageaholic if they don’t get their fix.

We’ve had a ‘guest’ aboard who “doesn’t smoke” (ie secret smokes). Cat’s been out of the bag for years. Everyone knows that person smokes. When said guest is out having a sneaky fag, how do you communicate that fact to other crew without raising eyebrows?

I’ve dubbed it, “The Tomahawk Walk”. Out for a stroll blowing smoke signals. The things I come up with while ironing – at least I think I’m funny.

But seriously, how many times have I seen crew who say, “I don’t smoke!” Light up as soon as they’re hidden, or have a few evening cocktails in them. Countless. Especially “Smoke Stack”. An American girl I interviewed prior to this season. One who said she didn’t smoke, but as soon as I saw her at a Rybovich Friday Night Crew Party a few hours after interviewing, she took the Tomahawk Walk and turned it into a full on Call to the Spirits Sit In with all of her other green stewie friends.

You can say you’re a social smoker, and maybe we can work with that as long as it NEVER interferes with work. If you try to hide it, I’ll call you out and embarrass you in front of your friends. Potentially burning one of them when you try to throw your cigarette. Haha. Caught.

Plus, if you Tomahawk Walk after coming aboard, be prepared to purchase a plane ticket home!

Smoking is so 80’s. Get in the times. We’re all fashionably functioning alcoholics.


Jess sig3

Side note: I have many friends who smoke, yes, yachting friends. But they’re not assholes and I still love them… most anyway.

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